If You Don’t Ask, You Don’t Get

Friday, 7 November, 2025

You know that feeling when you think you’ve been extra careful, only for it to backfire spectacularly?

That was me on holiday last week.

I’d taken my signed copy of Mary Portas’ latest book and tucked it carefully into my suitcase so it wouldn’t get bashed about in my hand luggage. I thought I was being clever.

You can probably see where this is going.

A bottle leaked through a supposedly protective bag and completely ruined it. The pages were soaked, the ink ran, and the dye bled all over my clothes.

I was far more gutted about the signed message and the book than the bluey purple tinged laundry.

When I told my friend Claire (Cow Mad Designs and Claire Coxhead Interiors), she did something very special.

She quietly messaged Mary Portas herself, who was right in the middle of her book tour at the time.

Mary arranged for Claire to pay for a new copy through a local bookshop, BookBar in Islington, signed it again, and even sent Claire a late-night message to say, ‘Done it.’

A few days earlier, I’d been at the AD:VENTURE Business Growth Gathering – Forging Future Success – at the Accu Stadium in Huddersfield.

Listening to speakers Alastair Morris from Accu and Sam Teale from Sam Teale Productions, Sam’s message really stayed with me:

“If you don’t ask, you don’t get. Know what you’re asking for.”

How’s that for timing?

There I was, thinking about that very message and suddenly living it.

Claire’s determination and Mary’s kindness brought it to life.

In business and in life, asking can feel uncomfortable. We don’t want to seem pushy, cheeky or like we’re taking up too much time. But when we don’t ask, we quietly miss out.

Whether it’s asking for help, opportunities, feedback or even a replacement book, sometimes the best things happen because someone simply does ask.

So here’s to the Claires and Sams of the world. The ones who ask, who dare, who reach out.

And here’s to the Marys who say yes.

Because if you’d ask, you don’t get. And sometimes, you even get a handwritten message at midnight to prove it.

PS I wish I’d captured on camera Claire turning up excitedly on my doorstep, me dressed in PJs. But when you know, you know, I ain’t showing you that.